Sometimes our enthusiasm has less of an impact than we think:

➤ I was advised to try the tasting menu, luckily i did, it was amazing, the wine paired exquisitely.

Ending with an adverb means the reader needs to go back to find the modified word. Rephrasing gives the review its impact:

➤ I was advised to try the tasting menu; and glad I was! Not only was the paired wine exquisite, the menu was sensational.

Writing one sentence with multiple ideas is confusing and difficult to read 😕. By using ‘Not only’, we introduce an element of surprise 😯. We can also add impact by removing adverbs and use stronger, more descriptive adjectives 🤓.

The tightened sentence is easier to read and has more impact. 😎

Sometimes, our enthusiasm to share information results in a confusing text:  😱

➤  A typical non-descript modern building from the outside the Hilton Garden Inn is very convenient for Temple Meads station (just a five minute stroll) and a little further from the harbour's lively facilities and the Town Centre, all in all around fifteen minutes walk from Central Boulevard.

Not only confusing, the poor reader has to edit and interpret what is written: considerate writers make writing readable! 😇

■ keep different subjects separate
■ be careful with vague or imprecise language
■ avoid using unfamiliar or generalist names, words or expressions
■ always check your spelling

What would you change in the above example? How would you improve it? 🤔

Structure and readability

Scientific papers and articles frequently write like this:

➤ The use of polymers to produce prosthetic heart valves that have the positive attributes of current commercial and mechanical valves without any of their drawbacks, has been a focus of research since the 1950s.

However, it does not read will and requires multiple readings. Help your read and create flow:

➤ Since the 1950s, scientists have been trying to use polymers to produce prosthetic heart valves which have the positive attributes of current commercial and mechanical valves, but without any of their drawbacks.

Formal writing has its place but whether you are writing for a general audience, or highly knowledgable, readability and flow are essential.

To keep it readable:

▪︎ make subjects people rather than concepts and place the main verb close to the subject
▪︎ choose strong verbs, check punctuation, and avoid unnecessarily long sentences

What advice would you add?

A new employee wrote, “I have a problem with a male. Could you help me?” to a colleague. Quite an unusually direct request from someone whom you have only just met!

Did they mean:

- I have a problem with an email.
- I have a problem with a male colleague.
- I have a problem with a personal male friend.

It transpired, after a discreet conversation, the new colleague had a problem with an email, but, in their haste, did not check their spelling. Initially, this resulted in an embarrassing dilemma for the recipient.

Normally, when new in a job, we do not discuss personal issues with unknown colleagues. Fortunately, the colleague did not mention this to anyone else; had they done so, the resulting rumours and gossip would have haunted the new employee from that day hence.

Be careful what you write! Misspelled or misused words may give the wrong impression, or set in motion an unwanted chain of events.

What would you have done?